Italian turist in Malta
(A hotel in Malta)
Pasquale: may I have two pieces of toast, please?
Waitress with only one piece of toast:
waitress: here you are!
Pasquale: I want two pieces
Waitress: go to the toilet then!
Pasquale: you don’t understand, I want two pieces on my plate!
Waitress: you’d better go to the toilet, stupid!
Pasquale: this lady doesn’t even know me and calls me “stupid”
Waiter bringing a spoon and a knife but no fork:
waiter: good evening, sir
Pasquale: good evening
Waiter: have you decided, sir?
Pasquale: I want a fork
Waiter: everyone wants to do that
Pasquale: you don’t understand me. I want a fork on the table
Waiter: you’d better not to do it on the table, you big stupid.
Pasquale: why they all call me stupid?
Pasquale: hello? There are no sheets on my bed. Can I speak to the manager, please?
Manager: hello? What’s the matter?
Pasquale: I want a sheet
Manager: go to the toilet!
Pasquale: you don’t understand. I want a sheet on my bed!
Manager: you’d better not to shit on your bed, you big stupid
Pasquale: I’m fed up, I will go back home
Receptionist: peace on you, sir
Pasquale: piss on you too, you big stupid. I want to go back to Italy